What is a Strength??

Throughout the course of my day as an Academic Advisor and Career Advisor, the question of "strengths" come up pretty regularly. I often announce (with gusto!) that my primary responsibility to students is to help them engage in deep soul reflection. My job (and my calling) is to engage them, coach them, and support them while they do the work of uncovering their natural strengths, gifts and talents. In my opinion, it's a noble quest. My students happen to get academic credit for doing it, because I work at an institution that understands how assisting students in this respect is a good thing. It's good for students, and in many ways the practicality of engaging students this way results in good things for the institution. Students are more engaged and directed. Students are more likely to persist and score well. Students are more likely to participate actively on campus when they see how to apply their gifts and develop their strengths.

So what is a "strength" exactly? What a tricky question. There is certainly more than one way to look at this, and my view of what a "strength" is has developed over time, reflection, and observation of myself and others. (What a great job I have right?)

A traditional view of a "strength" is really a synonym for "gift." In other words, our gifts are our strengths. If we find we are naturally good organizers for example, that is our strength. Sticking with this example here, if other people notice that this is your gift or strength, they are likely to delegate assignments and jobs to you that they believe you will do well. If you are the person that does the best job, and people believe you will do a quality job, you are more likely to be asked to do similar tasks over and over..in the process, you are adding skill to your natural strengths and getting even better at them. You grow to be even better at that thing you were already good at.

I give students "assessments" that help them to identify their natural "strengths" and tendencies. I ask them, "Who among you has ever had the opportunity to paddle a canoe or kayak?" When students raise their hands, because there is inevitably at least a handful of students that have had this experience, I ask them what the difference is between going with the current and against it. This is how I open my conversation about what natural "strengths" are.

When you paddle your canoe in the same direction the water is flowing, you get further faster, and it's just more fun. You could turn the boat around and fight the current, but the going will be harder and you are more likely to exhaust yourself in the process.

It seems to me though, there are a couple problems with this idea of strength. It doesn't account for what we love (because although we are good organizers maybe we hate being the ones always assigned to those tasks), and it doesn't recognize persistence in the face of difficulty.

Marcus Buckingham has written a number of books on the topic of, "strengths." He has a much different view about what a strength is and is not. In his opinion, a "strength" isn't something that we do well, a "strength" is something that makes us feel strong. He's produced a really inspirational video series called, "Trombone Player Wanted" (click to view) that makes me excited to challenge the traditional definition of "strength" with my students. In his opinion, we will only grow more and more into who we already are.

He uses the example of the report card in a discussion about how our society is not currently set up in the paradigm he professes to be most helpful. We have a tendency to focus on the "F" instead of celebrating the "A." We spend all our energy on what we're not doing well instead of investing that energy into getting even better at what we already have strength in. (Remember..strength here is what makes you feel strong coupled with something you're good at) He says we can not ignore the F, but we should spend more energy on making the A even more authentic. (paraphrasing him here).

So what of the things that make us feel strong that we aren't good at?? Marcus suggests these are where hobbies come in.

This paradigm, while inspiring and exciting (especially when put to great cello music!) still feels incomplete to me. I struggle with placing value in what comes easy and what makes us feel good over what one has shed blood, sweat, and tears to accomplish.

Is not engaging the struggle a strength in it's own right? Using "gift" instead of strength, let's think about this for a second. When you are given a "gift" you probably appreciate it and there is a sense of "luck." When you earn the ability to be genius at something, that goes beyond "gift" and infers, that you somehow have had to put in huge amounts of time to really take what you naturally had to the next level.

In my previous post, I discussed my "gift" of music. Music does make me feel strong, and I had quite a lot of natural tenancy toward it (I was raised around music so one could also argue that my "gift" was due to my environment). I did not however have the strength or drive to practice in a way that would ever elevate my ability to perform past the "hobby" category.

Einstein on the other hand had a gifted mind, but also had the strength to engage it. He said once, "Do not worry about your problems with mathematics. I assure you mine are far greater." Isn't that the truth! Without the ability to engage in struggle, Einstein would not have accomplished what he did even with his "gift" of a mind.

So my next question is this. Can we engage our "strengths" without learning that "strength" is required? Gifts come easy, but I'm not convinced we can develop them without working out our "persistence muscle."

So when my students choose to move class sections because there is an "easier" teacher, or when they are looking for the quickest easiest way to happiness, it causes me to think somehow our conversations about "strength" are incomplete. We have built a culture based around the idea that being happy is the most important thing. We avoid challenging work, and we avoid challenging others because, "we want them to feel good" about themselves. We rob people of the strength that comes with struggle. Further, we think we are helping to make a person more self confident by providing ways to "success" that aren't really authentic.

Do we really think students don't know when they've cheated the system? Ask any student and they know the difference between the easy A and the one they worked for. They are two entirely different experiences. One leaves a student either feeling a bit guilty (if they are honest and in touch with themselves) or like they've outsmarted a dumb system. The other gives the student the confidence to try even more difficult things in the future. They aren't afraid to struggle, and have learned to persist and overcome.

When was the last time you struggled to accomplish something? If you can't remember, I encourage you to set a goal that will be hard. Choose something that you haven't been able to accomplish in the past. Maybe it's something you even need coaching for...and do it! Do a physical challenge, change your lifestyle habits, really practice developing a gift until you are in an area of new growth (you'll know you're in an area of growth because you'll want to quit).

After you've struggled and won, let's talk about what strength is again. I bet those people on "Biggest Loser" have a different view than both the traditional view, AND Mr. Buckingham's views. They aren't naturally good at being healthy (That's why they're on the show right?) and initially, engaging in a healthy lifestyle isn't anything that makes them feel strong (have you seen those people melt down on the floor and puke in buckets?). But, what happens to them after they've completely broken down and decided to fully engage? They find authentic strength they never knew they had.

More than motivational speeches set to cello music, stories of people overcoming the odds are what get me excited. Stories about people that can dig in and work despite their frustration and how difficult the work is motivate me. To me, this part of "strength" is what we really need to teach our children and students so that they really can learn to capitalize on their gifts and pursue their dreams.